Board Thread:Lores/@comment-27029517-20180526175308

R2D:A Universe, several hours before all the jetpack malfunctions

''It is Kingstreet. An old American town off an uncharted coast. Not very well known, but filled with black market racketeering and gangsters were prevalent throughout this small city. Innocence was a rare commodity, and those who tried to improve the town simply disappeared long before ZHeM and SANI hit.''

''Because of all the criminal activity, Kingstreet was already in a mass state of dispair by the time the apocalypse even hit. After the SANI hit, Kingstreet fell silent. No shootouts, no criminals, no civilians, nothing, with the exception of zombies.''

''Everyone in the town was turned into zombies. Sure, the ones who could afford weapons were prepared for shootouts, but they certainly weren't prepared for what is pretty much the end of the world. It was only several years later when a group of well-armed survivors, along with a small group of remaining military soldiers, seized control of the city and sweeped the zombies in the surrounding area off the map. It had become a small military communications outpost. It has been 36 weeks since the establishment of the camp.''

''"John?" A voice calls out in a quiet room, in a previously abandoned apartment. John, a decorated veteran from the previous ZHeM virus, is suddenly awoken by the voice and fell off the chair, slightly startled. John had been drinking cheap tequila all night, worrying about the future generation of humanity.''

''John lands on the hard, rough concrete floor, face first smack into the ground. "OW, F!" John yells while he struggles to get up. "Next time, knock on the goddamn door, you autistic piece of shit," He (ironically) yells that the man who so rudely interrupted his sleep.''

''"Shame you didn't lose your head," the man snarkily replies. The man has not given any name, but goes under the codename "Blazing". An infamous survivor known for his extensive modification and abuse of grenades whenever he finds one, but at least with him on the survivors' side, along with John, Andreas, and "Jopede", they'll have nothing to fear. ''

For now.

''"Anyways John," Blazing's tone shifts from a smirking bastard to a more serious tone. "I've gotta tell you somethi-"''

''John cuts in. "First of all why didn't y-"''

''Blazing, not wanting to deal with John's bullshit again, interrupts John. "Ah-ah-ah-ah! Don't say a goddamn thing until I finish speaking. Going back to the topic, we have gained multiple reports from other military-controlled communication centers around the world, and it appears that this subject would definitely upset you."''

''John leans in. Ever since Blazing joined the group, John had immediately stopped caring about bad news, but this sounded interesting in particular.''

"You know those jetpacks you really love to use? Yeah, there has been reports of jetpacks suddenly beginning to breakdown and shi-"

''John emits a great laugh. "You must be shitting me," he replies, smirking. "Those jetpacks are the state-of-the-mother-F'ing-art technological shit of the modern age right before mankind fell to ZHeM and SANI, you dumbass. They CAN'T fail. Look, America and Russia deployed these bad boys in Afghanistan and caught ISIS with their ass out in the open and sent them packing home, retard. Remember?" John never was one for calmly responding to news. He was always a voice for his opinion, whether anyone cared or not.''

''Blazing rolls his eyes. Not this shit again, he thinks to himself. "...Well, whether you believe it or not, you should probably discard your jetpack now, John. You wouldn't want it to suddenly blow up when you're taking your beauty rest."''

''"Yeah, yeah, say what you want, cause I don't give a shit, Blazing," John deadpans. "Now, get the hell out of my room until I whoop your ass, gaylord."''

"You don't have to be homophobic just to deliver an insu-"

"I SAID GET THE F OUT OF MY ROOM!"

Real life, minutes before update 0.5.7

"Patch notes:

+ Added Shortnames for toolbar

     Christmas tree > XMas Tree

^ Reduced Jump energy from 20 to 14

^ Remade ADS system

     Through which ADS wim was fixed

     All guns now allow ADS aim

* Fixed camera rotating issues

* Fixed Objective gui in Cinematic

* Fixed Mogadishu glitchable part

* Fixed Objective not showing on Terminal

* Fixed common errors

* Fixed leaper sound after death

- Removed Jetpacks

     100$ per jetpack has been refunded

- Removed dynamic grip"

''Andreas Karlsson looks at his computer document of the patch note for the next update. John isn't going to be happy about this, but F it. Just go for it.''

Andreas publishes the update...

R2DA Universe, large zombie attack against Outpost Kingstreet

''The outpost is under attack. Hundreds of zombies flood on the large mechanical gates of the outpost. The gate could only hold back so much before the zombies breakthrough. And they're getting smarter. Panic had overwhelmed some of the people in the camp. Evacuation orders were sent. Not all stayed back to defend the evacuation but those brave enough to fight back at the front lines like John and Blazing relied heavily on the prepared defenses.''

For John, all of this is about to change.

''Twelve brutes crashes through the gates, sending the doors to the outpost tumbling into the sea. Several men with bazookas fire rockets at them. Out of the twelve brutes that broke through the gates, three remains. They quickly overwhelm the men on the ground, but John had placed himself on the Kingstreet bridge, equipped only with the one and only mythical weapon - the Railgun.''

''He fires. The first shot from the railgun obliterates a brute attempting to destroy a vehicle with multiple passengers within it. The passengers escapes in time.''

''He fires again. The second shot from the railgun assimilates a brute breaking through the center of the Kingstreet town, destroying all communication equipment, but it doesn't matter - almost everyone had escaped.''

''John searches for the third brute, only to realise it was aiming for him. The brute had witnessed John destroy two other brutes with the railgun, and - as if seemingly aware that the railgun will malfunction on the next shot - ducks behind cover.''

''John fires the third shot. The railgun jams; what remained of the cooling system before K177 removed it had caved in. The railgun is useless. He throws the railgun into the sea and brings out the bazook-''

''An explosive wooden club launches towards were John was hiding. Gravity causes the the club to drop, but considering that several brutes prior to the outpost's establishment had somehow managed to weaken the already in despair bridge...''

It collapses.

''John, having prepared for quick getaways, launches his jetpack foward and lands on a nearby rooftop. Knowing he doesn't have anymore weapons to fight against the brute, as well as he accidentally dropped his bazooka after the bridge collapses, he goes after the tunnel exit, leading to safety.''

But it doesn't happen.

''His jetpack had sent him flying straight into the sky - John, realizing what Blazing had said to him earlier was true, panickly attempts to regain control of the malfunctioning jetpack. It catches on fire.''

Then, an explosion.

Then, a crack and a blackout.

Then, falling.

"Audio log number... whatever. Don't give a shit. Patient #32520. Name: Johnathon. Last name unknown - allprevious records pertaining patient's information have been lost.

''Patient #32520 was a survivor working with a small band of military soldiers which had managed to secure and establish a communication post in Kingstreet, a formerly criminal-ridden town. During a massive zombie attack on the outpost on ██/██/2016, all survivors except patient #32520 escaped Kingstreet. Patient stayed behind to provide covering fire. After the destruction of two brutes, another one had somehow destroyed the bridge that led to Kingstreet, despite no signs of despair or damage appeared. Sudden bridge collapse possibly due to previous brute presence damaging said structure prior to military occupation. While the patient attempted escape with his personal jetpack, it malfunctioned mid-flight, launched him upwards, blew up, and sent him hurling down onto the destroyed roads of Kingstreets. He's goddamn lucky to have survived the entire ordeal and was saved by military soldiers who decided to re-enter Kingstreet just to get the patient out of there. We're currently investigating on why every existing jetpack in the world nearly-simuntaneously malfunctioned and combusted, but for now, keep this patient in the military hospital under intensive care until he reaches full-recovery, even if that shit's possible. Oh and I forgot, patient #32520 suffered multiple fractured spine bones, organ rupture (not going to indulge in that information), broken skull (somehow living through that), broken leg, twisted ankle, complete destruction of toes and fingers, a broken arm and minor but permanent vision blurriness. Hopefully he doesn't get amnesia from what happened. Jesus.''

This has been Dr. ████████, signing off." 